Page Content: The toxic culture of violence against women will only begin to change if we start to realise that sexist jokes can be just as bad as physical violence, writes Elisabet le Roux of the Unit for Religion and Development Research at Stellenbosch University in an opinion article published in the Witness on Tuesday (24 November 2014).
The complete article, as submitted, follows below:
Culture of violence against women needs detoxing
Sexist jokes at a braai is as big a problem as physical abuse, writes Elisabet le Roux ahead of 16 Days of Activism against Violence against Women and Children.
Earlier this year, the first Global Summit to End Sexual Violence in Conflict took place in London. Attended by 48 foreign ministers, more than 600 delegates from 113 countries, 100 NGOs and international partners, and film star Angelina Jolie as co-chair, the summit drew worldwide attention to one of the most horrific aspects of armed conflict – the sexual abuse of women and girls.
Though events like these are much-needed and very important, the focus on armed conflict must not let us lose sight of the fact that violence against women and girls is also endemic during times of peace. Research has repeatedly shown that the nature and extent of the gender-based violence (GBV) that occurs during war is determined by what society allows during times of peace.
As writer and gender expert Paula Donovan points out, "Humankind's level of tolerance for sexual violence is not established by international tribunals after war. That baseline is established by societies, in times of peace. The rules of war can never really change as long as violent aggression against women is tolerated in everyday life."
So, where does this leave us here in South Africa?
Sadly, we are notorious for our high rates of rape and other forms of GBV. A war is being waged against our women. Not a day goes by that we do not read or hear stories of women and girls being kidnapped, raped, mutilated, burnt and murdered. It has reached such a level that only the truly horrific is considered newsworthy. Cases such as that of Anene Booysen receive coverage in the media and elicit a public outcry, but women whose husbands beat them every night receive no support.
Another, very worrying aspect is that the most unsafe zone is our homes. While we stereotype rapists as 'strangers', research done in various parts of the country shows that perpetrators are most often known to the victim. Children are being violated by fathers, stepfathers, uncles, grandfathers, neighbours, and cousins. All of the adult sexual violence survivors that were part of a recent South African research project indicated that their first experience of sexual abuse was as children, perpetrated by someone they trusted, usually a family member and usually in their own home.
Also, within these households various forms of abuse were a common occurrence and experienced by all of the women and girls within the house. One survivor spoke of it as 'generational violence', explaining that her grandmother, mother, she herself, all her sisters, and both of her daughters have been raped, most of them more than once by different men; while her grandfather, father, and brother abused various women.
The war against women and girls is being fought in a space that they are supposed to be most safe in, and they are being attacked by those who are supposed to be most protective of them.
But our society is also participating in this war, for we create the environment that allows and even condones this behaviour. Both men and women are guilty of engaging in behaviours and language that objectify and belittle women.
Think about the disparaging way many men talk about their female partners, the myriad sex-related derogatory terms for women, and the hip-thrusting action a man performs for the entertainment of his friends when a good-looking girl walks by. Or the sexist jokes told casually at a braai. All of these create a culture that overlooks or excuses violent behaviour towards women.
Often wrapped in the faux-innocent wrapper of 'just kidding', we allow and perpetuate attitudes towards women, their sexuality, and their roles in society that normalise violence towards women.
Given this, we should welcome and support any initiative that seeks to end violence against women. We should use campaigns like the United Nations International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women (25 November) and the ensuing 16 Days of Activism against Violence against Women and Children to draw much-needed attention to this scourge.
However, we need to go one step further and realise that the physically violent acts perpetuated against women are only the tip of the iceberg. Obviously, those actively perpetrating violence need to change their behaviour. But the rest of us also have a responsibility to refrain from jokes, derogatory terms, bumper stickers, wolf whistles, and mimed actions that serve to belittle, dehumanise and objectify women. For these create a toxic culture in which violence against women can be enacted with impunity.
Apart from realising and acknowledging that our country has a sexually violent culture, we need to recognise our own (indirect) contribution to this culture. Only then will we be able to end violence against women.
- Elisabet le Roux is a senior researcher in the Unit for Religion and Development Research at Stellenbosch University. She focuses on gender-based violence, particularly sexual violence and the role of religion and religious institutions.
